Teddy Bear Wars: Battle of Sugar Town

Lady Emma Cuddlestone-Smythe

This afternoon, my daughter, Lady Emma Cuddlestone-Smythe and I (Lord Paddington Bear) decided to test our military prowess on the kitchen table. To the victor would go the M&Ms.

"You're going down Bear!" said Lady Emma.

"We shall see Your Highness, we shall see" was the only retort that I could think of.


Lord Paddington Bear, AKA Beldar Conehead.

So I set the kitchen table with some terrain, including a couple of huts made by Gundt (the model maker, not the plush toy maker of bears), a few trees and some road sections in the manner shown below:


The field of battle, showing the Blue Bear Army of Lady EC-S at the lower left end of the table and the Pink Bear Army of Lord PB at the top right corner. Sugar Town Village lies in the middle of the table.

Those of you with a keen eye and an Old School way of thinking will immediately recognize this as the Bear version of the Sawmill Village scenario. Both armies enter the table in one of the corners and advance towards the village in the middle of the field. The village contains much needed supplies and vittles (in this case, M&M candies). The objective was to capture the most M&Ms and defeat the opponent in battle.

I offered Lady Emma the choice of armies, and she selected the Blue Bear force (24 figures) and I took command of the Pink Bear force by default. We rolled a D6 each turn to see who would move first and then another D6 to see who would get the first fire. The rest of the rules were very simple. Bears could walk 8" or run 12". You could run for up to two consecutive turns, but if you do so twice, then your bears would have to remain stationary for one turn to recover their breath. Shooting was done at a range of up to 12" (requiring a 5 or 6 on a D6, or 4, 5 or 6 at short range of 6" or less). Saving rolls were allowed for any bear that was "put to sleep" if the unit commander rolled a natural six on one D6 per injured bear. Any melees would be done on a figure to figure contact with each player rolling a D6 (with a +1 pip for a leader) and the higher die roll winning the individual combat.

Lady Emma marshals here Blue Bear army and marchs them down the road towards Sugar Town, in search of snacks.


Both forces march toward Sugar Town looking for snacks.


Uh oh! The veteran Pink Bears get caught in column by the Blue Bears, who have smartly deployed into line. Our rules allow two ranks to fire and Lady Emma won the first fire initiative with a higher die roll.


Things are off to a bad start for Lord Paddington Bear's Pink Army after the first firing of the game.


Lady Emma secures the first of the M&Ms in the game as one company of 12 bears fights in the streets while the second company of 12 bears searches for the snacks, er supplies in the village.


Our first melee in the garden of one of the homes in Sugar Town. Care to guess who won?


The remnants of the Pink Bear force hole up in one of the houses, which happened to be filled with M&Ms. This attracted nearly every Blue Bear on the table as they stormed the house and attempted to break down the door. The Pink Bears held the door for two turns before succumbing to the Blue Bears.


The Pink Bear army surrenders and is accorded honors of war. They march smartly out of Sugar Town between rows of Blue Bears.


The Loser: Lord Paddington Bear.


The Victor (yet again): Lady Emma Cuddlestone-Smythe.


The Spoils of Victory. Each side placed any captured M&Ms into their own ramikin. The side with the most M&Ms at the end won the game. You can see that it was a very lop-sided victory in favor of the Blue Bear Army.

Well, it was a total rout of the Pink Bear Army by the Blue Bear Army. Each side started the game with 24 bears, divided into two companies of 12 bears. At the end of the game, the Pink Bears had 4 alive, 7 captured and 13 "sleeping". In contrast, the Blue Bears only had 4 bears "sleeping" at the end. The Pink Bears secured only 4 M&Ms and the rest of the package was rounded up by the Blue Bears.

Now some of you might think Lord Paddington Bear let Lady Emma Cuddlestone-Smythe win, and you would be far from right. She won nearly all of the first fire initiatives on each turn -- my die rolling wasn't very good -- and I got clobbered in the garden melee and the break in of the supply house.

I am looking forward to avenging this loss in a rematch very soon. Stay tuned for further battles in the legendary Teddy Bear Wars.